Blog #3: AP English Literature Benchmark Prose Essay & Reflection/Revisions & Reflection

Prose Essay

          In the "The Beet Queen" by Louise Erdrich, the author subtly indicates how environment follows the children'slife through bleak setting imagery and specific selection detail.

           Although one could argue that Erdrich's literary choices, in conjunction with the environment, are a coincidence, that is simply not accurate. Throughout the course of the narrative, the situation becomes more desperate and confusing for the children. That isn't to say the imagery starts off cheery as Erdrich states, "cold spring morning in 1932...their lips were violet...feet so numb...scraped their palms." Argus did not get off to a strong start after leaving the freight, which the 'cold' spring morning predicted would happen. Sure enough, Argus' experience after leaving the freight was cold and negative to say the least. Later the narrator determined that the night caused "the chill to reach deep." The environment is directly affecting their condition. 

          The environment not only affects the plot, but is the plot. The main discussion points of this passage are centered around what can be found in nature: tree branch, the night, small trees, sudden snow, flowers, to name a few. The fate of the two children is directly tied to the environment. When their local environment is in a state of havoc, it can be a sure-fire bet that so is the character's current state.

          This is evidenced by the last paragraph where later that summer, "leaves fall away... bore no blossoms." An active reader could predict in this instant that all may not be well. The child even used nature in more symbolism as "struck out with the tree branch" to 'drop' the dog in the "sudden snow".

This shows what defining day it was for Karl and Mary. Karl choosing to leave home for the boxcar indicates he was not comfortable in this new environment. The environment impacted him so much that he chose to leave. Perhaps he realized this thought, through the sensation of "his face pressed in the flowers."

         There is almost no dialogue in this passage, so the author had to utilize proper imagery that makes the mind truly think. Also, the fact that almost every detail centered around a fixture of nature demonstrates carefully selected selection of details.

Reflection: Over the last few days, we have discussed various essays for the prompt, "The Beat Queen" by Louise Erdrich. Since this essay was more difficult than the poetry essay, I will be taking a look at where my writing faltered. Reading this essay, it is clear my thoughts are all over the place, and not particularly insightful. It wasn't until the last 10 or so minutes of class that I started to interpret the prose passage with more success. Much of the evidence I used was unimportant or had analysis attached that was 'off'', which led to repetitive points. I chalk that up to being unfocused, my first prose essay, and not knowing where to start. I also think I tried to answer the prompt too much, by relating analysis back to the environment even when it didn't add any depth to my writing. Overall, I give myself a 3 on this occasion due to having textual support, being unfocused, and having an altogether unconvincing argument. In the future, I should complete a lot more pre-writing so my thoughts are more organized.

Reflection for Yash: A score of 5 seems about right for this essay. As others have mentioned, the writing is informative and correct, but lacks a deeper level of interpretation. In the future, it might be useful to develop a more dynamic thesis. This would give more of an opportunity for discussion in the body paragraphs, thus making the overall essay more complete. Extensive pre-writing may help you make connections inside the text as well. Having examined your essay, it was a solid first attempt, and it's clear you have a great foundation for the future.

Blog #2: AP English Literature Benchmark Poetry Essay & Reflection/Revision & Reflection

             In the sixteenth-century poem For That He Looked Not upon Her by George Gascoigne, the author expertly evaluates his social attitudes through imagery and diction to tell an emotional story.

             Gascoigne begins the poem by addressing 'Her' and stating that "you must not wonder, though you think it strange" when speaking about his head which is held low. This immediately achieves the idea that the author is not comfortable in his own skin. By assuming she "think it strange", he gives off the sense that is not worthy of speaking to her. Instead of being confident in himself, he is being defensive right off the bat, and apologizing for past behavior. This sets the tone for the rest of the poem.

            The author then uses a mouse metaphor to explain not only the attitude of many individuals, but to subtly indicate his feelings for her. In lines 6-7, the author explains that a mouse whom evades a trap, "is seldom 'ticed with the trustless bait, But lies aloof for fear of more mishap." This theory, a theory that believes risk is not equal to reward, a theory which holds a guiding principle of safety, shows just how protected and sheltered the 'mouse' lives. Although no physical harm is done to the mouse, no emotional gain is achieved either, as he feels "aloof for fear". In actuality, the mouse is symbolic of the author. The imagery used is very relatable to every audience imaginable, which helps emphasize his thoughts. This story is just one example the author uses to explain his feelings for her.

            The poem ends with a choice the author can make. In lines 13-14, the author states, "So that I wink or else hold down my head, Because your blazing eyes my bale have bred." The diction choice of "blazing" shows he is clearly fond of the girl he is speaking to. The option that he details to her is that she may be given attention by the author or not, but that depends on how daring the author chooses to live. He may get burned like the fly (line 9), or he could wink and take delight of the gleams on her face (line 4). This demonstrates a clear attitude dilemma he faces, as it seems he may be lacking confidence or even afraid. Even still, he is "dazzled by desire" in the hopes that all will turn out well.


          Through a couple of crucial, imaginative examples, the author explains his inner thoughts to the girl in an elegant fashion.


Reflection:  On August 21st, we analyzed the rubric for the George Gascoigne poem prompt to decipher deserving scores for various essays. Now I am digging deeper to determine where my own writing can be improved. At the time I felt my interpretations of the poem were correct, but after viewing more specific and concise essays, I'm not convinced that is true. I then noticed there were many literary terms that the sample essays mentioned, that I was completely unaware of.  There seemed to be many rookie mistakes as well such as: 5 paragraph essay, non-existent transitions, too vague of a thesis, and superficial analysis to name a few. Having analyzed the rubric, sample essays, and 5 Steps to a 5, I now think this essay is worthy to be scored around a 4. This means that, although an adequate first attempt, there's a lot of room for improvement.

Comment on Yash's essay: The score of a 6 for your essay is fair, as it addresses the prompt well and includes detailed analysis. In turn, this analysis is backed up strongly through evidence from the poem. The most important element of the essay, in my eyes, is a strong interpretation of the poem. This seemed evident and reasonable, although the analysis could be better developed and more convincing. One suggestion I have is to not mention the author's "excellent diction" but to instead give the diction (or any other device) a description. This understanding could significantly improve your score to the desired 7 you wish to attain. For a first essay, however, this is a solid interpretation of George Gascoigne's writing.
http://patelyashapenglish2016.blogspot.com/

Comment on James' essay: A score of 6 for this George Gascoigne essay is more than fair, especially for a first draft. For me, the most relevant and crucial aspects of the essay was cemented in the body paragraphs. It was there that you discussed the author's motive for using rhyming schemes, and how it connected to the the speaker's complex attitude. It is true, however, that some of the analysis could be more convincing and more developed.In the time constraints, I think your ideas were expressed clearly. The essay also flowed nicely, as paragraph hooks made the essay easy to read. Having read your interpretation of the poem, I believe this is a solid analysis with a great foundation to improve upon.
http://zhujamesapenglish2016.blogspot.com/

Essay Revision
        In "For That He Looked Not upon Her", George Gascoigne explains to the reader the character's inner struggle with self-worthiness as it relates to the opposite sex. Gascoigne's emotional fragility, as it turns out, is in direct conflict with his ability to express himself. Utilizing real-life examples, Gascoigne implements situational imagery and thoughtful analogies to convey the character's contrast between thoughts and actions, as it relates to 'Her'.

         Gascoigne begins the poem by addressing 'Her' and stating that "you must not wonder, though you think it strange" when speaking about his gloomy head which is held low. This immediately achieves the idea that the author is not comfortable in his own skin. By assuming she "think it strange", he gives off the sense that is not worthy of speaking to her. In fact, he comes off of as submissive and unsure of himself. Instead of being confident, he is being defensive right off the bat, and apologizes for past behavior. This sets the tone for the rest of the poem.

       The speaker then uses a mouse analogy to explain not only the attitude of many individuals, but to subtly indicate his feelings for her. In lines 6-7, the author explains that a mouse whom evades a trap, "is seldom 'ticed with the trustless bait, But lies aloof for fear of more mishap." This theory, a theory that believes risk is not equal to reward, a theory which holds a guiding principle of safety, shows just how protected and sheltered the 'mouse' lives. Although no physical harm is done to the mouse, no emotional gain is achieved either, as he feels "aloof for fear". In actuality, the mouse is symbolic of the main character. The speaker is very conflicted on his role in the relationship with his significant other. The mouse is cautious of death, similar to how the speaker is cautious of his place in the relationship. This story is just one example the author uses to explain his feelings for her.

        The poem ends with a choice the author can make. In lines 13-14, the author states, "So that I wink or else hold down my head, Because your blazing eyes my bale have bred." The diction choice of "blazing" shows he is clearly fond of the girl he is speaking to. Powerful words such as "blazing" and "gleams" indicate the woman is very sure of herself. It is also evident that her presence captures the spirit and attention of the narrator. He simply "takes no delight to range" which is supposed to be a compliment. The option that he details to her is that she may be given attention by the author or not, but that depends on how daring the author chooses to live. He may get burned like the fly (line 9), or he could wink and take delight of the gleams on her face (line 4). This demonstrates a clear attitude dilemma he faces, as it seems he may be lacking confidence or even afraid. Even still, he is "dazzled by desire" in the hopes that all will turn out well.

       What the speaker seems to imply through his selection of figurative language, namely the analogies, is that he is afraid of uncomfortable situations. Afraid to take a leap of faith. Deep down he seems to realize that she would better him, as this poem is truly a poem of self-discovery and evaluation. Although they may be opposites on a personal level, there is clearly something that he feels is missing in daily life.
       

Blog #1: AP Literature Multiple Choice Test Reflection

          

Multiple Choice Pretest Chunky Paragraph

            On August 18, I completed a shortened version of an AP Literature multiple choice test that consisted of around 25 problems. The goal of the exercise was to set a baseline of my skills at the beginning of the semester in order to make progress in this class. Although it was a difficult assessment, I was encouraged by a slight familiarity with the questions. There seems to be less of a learning curve with this AP test after taking an assessment with similar layout in AP Composition. For me, the most significant issue was my lack of knowledge about poetry and literary terms. Later, I realized this should come in time as the class continues onward. Having experienced this practice test, I now realize the AP exam can be, although challenging, very manageable once we learn all the material. This understanding could be essential to me as a learner because I won’t be afraid to make mistakes in order to improve my writing and reading skills.